Relationship Building Blocks

Published February 18, 2009 by Patty Brisben

There are many factors that go into a healthy relationship, but there are some that I feel are especially essential to building a relationship that lasts. Many of us falsely believe that when the fireworks are flying and we fall headfirst into love that the rest should just fall right into place. Truth be told, there is a lot of work that goes into a good relationship. There should be a focused effort on upholding important values including many of those listed below. Every relationship is different and there will be many other values that you will add to this list. Additionally, they are not in a specific order of importance or priority!

1.LOVE
People often assume that this means loving your partner, but even before you can love your partner you need to love yourself! I’ve seen so many women over the years who have looked to their significant others to fill a void with love and it always ends in misery, games and power struggles! When you invest the time into loving yourself it will make it that much easier to love your partner in a healthy way.

2.TRUST
Do you trust your partner? It may sound cliché, but trust truly is the cornerstone of any relationship. When you can’t rely on them to be there for you, or that they are being 100% honest and forthright with you, it may not be worth the commitment on your end. You need to follow your gut to determine whether this person should qualify as someone in your “playing the field” stage or is truly worthy of a full on commitment.

3.COMMUNICATION & RESPECT
You should always be able to talk openly with one another without feeling fear of being criticized or judged. This is especially true when you are experiencing conflict in your relationship. This leads to the importance of respect. Respect will protect you from falling into abusive (physical or emotional) relationships where your well-being is in severe jeopardy. It will also ensure that you are involved with someone who truly cares about your growth as an individual, and looks up to you for the unique qualities you bring to the relationship.

4.FRIENDSHIP
Do you have fun together? Do you genuinely enjoy each other’s company? This is so important. When the lust wears off you have to feel that this person is truly your best friend and someone you can rely on for support and friendship, especially when the going gets tough.

5.ROMANCE & INTIMACY
Too often relationships begin with an intimate life which is equivalent to a cannonball shooting through the sky; it is destined to eventually fall. In many long-term and married relationships couples often give up on keeping romance and intimacy alive. They assume that just because they love each other it should happen naturally. However, this is when we need step up and make the most effort! Explore new avenues together (whether it’s through bedroom toys, new position or experience). Remember that intimacy is not just sex – hold hands, kiss and be affectionate – you’ll be amazed at how sexy this will make you feel. Do the little things that will make one another feel romantic and appreciated. It won’t be long before you’ll be rekindling the spark from your earlier years together.

2 comments on “Relationship Building Blocks

  • An excellent post. I agree that these are all important points but as you say, we’re all different.
    I’d like to add a point.
    ACCEPTANCE –
    Accept him without trying to change him. We often enter into a relationship with the object of trying to change our partner, or to mold him into something that we want him to be. Accept him and love him as he is. If he is not what you want, don’t marry him!

  • Hi Patty!
    Thank you so much for your informational Blogs. The one from January 19th on Sexual Health and Aging really helped me to book a Party at a Senior Citizen Center! I have only been a rep for 3 weeks, in Lima, Oh and I met you first at the Foundation fundraiser at Bar Louie, with my husband.I was so very impressed with everyone there, especially you! After watching the TLC documentary I felt I already knew you! You did not dissapoint! Then when you were greeting customers at the Warehouse sale on February 14th, (just like a regular consultant!} and you remembered “me” I was doubly impressed. I was amazed at the number of customers there!! As a new rep I came to look and learn! I am so proud to be part of Pure Romance. I have experienced “down-to-earth” People,Professionalism and Respect from you, and everyone I have met, especially the Customer Service reps who are Fantastic, and extremely helpful!
    You have every right to be proud of creating an OUTSTANDING business…….
    PS> Who won the diamond pendant auction from the fundraiser?

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