Between The Sheets

Growing up in the 60s and 70s, we were always bombarded by the Noxzema commercials and I was fortunate enough to be dubbed the “Noxzema Girl” by a lot of friends and family. Whether it was washing my makeup off before bed or investing in facial creams for dry skin, I had been blessed with healthy skin and learned early on the importance of preserving it.

I’ve always believed that if you’ve been given a gift or positive attribute, you should do your best to take care of it! Starting with a great skin regiment is so important, which is why I was thrilled to recently bring on the new Pure Romance Daily Facial Care Set.

I had actually been using the products from this set for several years prior to bringing it on as part of the Pure Romance line. Throughout my travels, I’ve had the pleasure of visiting some of the most renowned spas in the world and time after time the estheticians would refrain from recommending the facials! They would tell me that whatever product I was using I needed to continue doing so. I also discovered that this same exact facial set was being sold in many of these upper-echelon spas for upwards of $350 and $400. Pure Romance is about offering high quality products at practical prices which is why we are excited to announce that we are offering this set for only $85.

If you don’t pamper yourself already, it’s time to start. Women are often so busy taking care of everyone else, we sometimes forget to take care of ourselves – and it shows! I can’t tell you how many women write into me every day and talk about how they don’t take care of themselves and how it directly affects their self-image and intimate relationships. I believe one of the best ways to increase excitement in the bedroom is to make time to pamper yourself.

We are so excited that Pure Romance has introduced this product and that we are able to give back to women and ensure that when they look in the mirror they will feel both healthy and beautiful.

As many of you know, Pure Romance has been taking part in Empowerment Summits throughout the country training and empowering our Consultants to take their businesses to the next level. During this all day training I get the opportunity to do what I love to do: educate our Consultants about Pure Romance’s products. This past Empowerment Summit I attended, some of the Consultants raised very important questions they receive from their customers regarding our lubricants.

Below are some of those questions and answers which I will hope shed some light on this must-have product.

Q: What is the difference from a Pure Romance lubricant and a lubricant that I can buy at the grocery store?
A: The first major difference between a Pure Romance lubricant and one that you can buy at the grocery store is the privacy you receive when purchasing our products. You don’t run the risk of running into your boss or one of your children’s teachers when you are purchasing a Pure Romance lubricant. The second difference is the quality of our lubricants. I make sure that Pure Romance lubricants are of the highest quality. The lubricants sold in grocery and drug stores have a high concentration of ingredients that can often irritate the skin over time. Pure Romance has the lowest amount of these ingredients. We formulate our lubricants for all women, even those who are highly sensitive.

Q: If a customer has sensitive skin but wants to try a flavored lubricant what should I tell her? A: We carry two different types of lubricants: our every day lubricants and our playful lubricants. Our every day lubricants are gentle and formulated for women who are sensitive. I would advise a woman who has sensitive skin to stick with an every day lubricant. If she wants to try a playful lubricant, I would advise her to place a pea size amount on the inside of her elbow before bed. If she wakes up rash free then she should be okay to experiment with the playful lubricant during intimate activities.

Q: Do lubricants affect a woman’s fertility?
A: Lubricants do not “kill” sperm, or else they would be listed as a form of contraception. However, lubricants can decrease the concentration and mobility of sperm in the vagina, but this does not pose a problem for women who aren’t experiencing fertility issues. Lubrication can make intercourse more enjoyable, which may increase the frequency of times you try to conceive, which can indirectly increase the likelihood of conception.

To learn more about the lubricants we offer, go to the Lubricant section of the PureRomance.com website.

For those of you who were watching football this past weekend, you probably noticed the pink gloves, sneakers, ball cap bills and the like – all in support of breast cancer awareness. It’s officially Breast Cancer Awareness Month and it’s SO important to get out and do your part for this important cause!

I kicked off the month at the Pink Ribbon Luncheon at the Duke Energy Center Thursday, October 1st, where Pure Romance was a sponsor. The Luncheon was preceded by a women’s health-themed panel which featured 7 local physician experts answering many of the common questions asked by their female patients.

Chris Collingsworth emceed the “Gems and Jeans” event which featured adorable country-themed table centerpieces (blackberry cameras don’t always do it justice!)

and headlined with a concert by two-time Grammy award winning country music singer and songwriter Lee Ann Womack. She did quite a few of her songs and some covers (my favorite cover was “Help Me Make It Through the Night”). And of course, the song she is most famous for and so many of us love, “I Hope You Dance”:

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The Pink Ribbon Luncheon has raised more than 1.4 million dollars over the past 8 years for the Pink Ribbon programs!

Cincy Chic (an online publication for women in Greater Cincinnati) invited us to participate in their third annual Bras with Flair on the Square to promote breast health. Pure Romance and the Patty Brisben Foundation were two of the many organizations excited to decorate bras to raise awareness and funds for this important cause.

For those of you locally who would like to stop by to support this wonderful event, all of the decorated bras will be on display Wednesday, September 30th on Fountain Square during the following times: 7-9 a.m., 11 a.m.-1 p.m. and 4-7 p.m. Attendees and passersby can visit the booths, sign up for a mammogram, get in the Lexus River Center “Cash Cab” to win prizes and also cast their vote for their favorite bra. The top 10 favorite bras will be up for auction – to benefit Susan G Komen For the Cure – at the after party at the Hilton Netherland Plaza from 7-10 p.m.

Below are the two bras we have submitted for this year’s event!

Click below to see photos from previous Bras with Flair Campaigns.
• 2008 Bras with Flair on the Square
• 2007 Bras with Flair on the Square

When it comes to “Ice Ice Baby”, most people think of the early 90s rap star icon OR the one and only, long-loved Pure Romance bedroom toy. Seldom do they think of both together. However, that was exactly the case when Pure Romance Consultant Christy Irwin had the unique idea to take an Ice Ice Baby to rapper, Vanilla Ice’s concert to be autographed and auctioned to raise money for the Patty Brisben Foundation.

While many covet backstage passes to meet the performer, this Consultant acquired one with one passion specifically in mind: to help further research and support for women’s sexual health! How she managed to smuggle such a one-of-a-kind item to be signed, however, is still an interesting scenario to imagine.

Once back stage she discovered the rapper had already had heard there was a bedroom toy named after him but didn’t know which company it was. After she explained the seriousness of the cause, he graciously signed it; it was great that he was able to see the value in taking the time to sign something that “unique” knowing that it would be auctioned off to support women’s sexual health. There are a lot of celebrities out there who wouldn’t take the time and we’re grateful that he did. Christy followed up by sending him another Ice Ice Baby to keep as a collector’s item!

A special thanks to Christy and all of the Consultants who are always looking for ways to support such an important cause!

About the Patty Brisben Foundation: When I first began working as a Consultant, I received many questions regarding intimacy and sexual health; as my parties increased and later after starting my own business, I noticed the questions were becoming more and more complex. I would always surround myself with experts and a support system that could ensure that I was getting my customers the right answers.

The biggest surprise came when even the experts didn’t know the answers and that’s when I realized how little women’s sexual health research there is available. This is when I decided to start the 501c3 non-profit, the Patty Brisben Foundation. Today, Pure Romance Consultants are just as passionate about helping their customers find the answers they need to be empowered in and out of the bedroom. To learn more go to the Patty Brisben Foundation’s website.

Yesterday I had the pleasure of being invited by the Cincinnati Chamber of Commerce’s We Share program to facilitate a roundtable with some of the brightest and most ambitious business women in Cincinnati. The topic of the discussion was balance and how to find a healthy way to incorporate it into your life.

One of the most common questions I was asked was how I was able to manage my business doing in-home parties while raising four young children.

For me, prioritizing time, maintaining organization, and enlisting an assistant when necessary were three things I did consistently. When I started traveling for trainings and conventions, I definitely missed my children. Not to mention there were weekends where I had five parties booked that I didn’t get to tuck them into bed or see their faces as often as I would have liked to, but the business also allowed me to take weekend vacations with them, attend their school and sporting functions and afford a club membership at the pool where we often spent many summer days. Like any business you had to find the balance and there was definitely the bitter and the sweet.

The key is to plan and define what your needs and your family’s needs are and remember your “why” during those moments. When I started to wonder if all of the hard work was worth it, I would look in the mirror and say, “Why are you doing all of this?” My answer was always clear and resounding; I worked my business to provide the best possible life for my children. I recruited other women often and provided them with the best possible training because I felt I was in a position to empower them financially, and in turn empower the women who attended their parties by giving them the best information out there to enhance their intimate lives. My “why” remains consistent to this day: I want to empower women intellectually, financially, and physically, and I want to provide the same opportunity to my children.

It isn’t necessarily how I did it; it is why I did it all. I have been able to educate and empower women and I am blown away by the amount of women I am able to reach now that my company has grown so large. When I was at my busiest I would think of my children and it would motivate me and ultimately led me to the success I have today. In the process, I taught all four of them the importance of holding on to a work ethic: I am happy to come to work every day now and see them diligently and passionately working for the same cause I have pursued over the past 26 years!

While reading Glamour magazine I came across an article where one young, brave woman named Darci said she was experiencing pain during sexual arousal. It crippled her dating life and even turned her away from pleasuring herself due to the pain she experienced during sexual arousal. After years of feeling hopeless and mistakenly blaming herself, she finally found the answer. Bringing issues like this into the lime light is a difficult thing, but a major step in the mission to broaden awareness among women.

Today’s society is jam-packed with sexual messages in music, media, entertainment and even everyday conversation. Yet, the message we consistently see is that people “enjoy” and “desire” sex. In reality, when it comes to sexuality there are so many circumstances where women silently suffer because they feel it is “wrong” or “taboo” to admit or even talk about.

I’ve always believed that education combined with permission leads to sexual empowerment. When I started doing intimacy parties back in 1983, I began to realize how through this platform I was in a position to truly help women. I was educating them about their body and the intimate aspects of their love life, and with every lotion, lubricant and bedroom accessory I discussed they were opening up to each other about private secrets that they never would have felt comfortable talking about before. They were giving each other permission to discuss sexual health topics that their mother and society told them to remain quiet about in the past.

If these women didn’t discuss these topics, how would they ever find the permission to let go of the message that it is wrong to enjoy sex? And if they continued to believe this message, how would they ever seek the education necessary to enjoy their bodies to the fullest potential? Over the past decade it has become easier for women to discuss the enjoyment of sex, but what about the women who still aren’t enjoying it? Ladies, it’s my hope that you will help one another find the courage to speak up about sex and intimacy and not be afraid or embarrassed about something that is such a beautiful and natural part of life!

I was having dinner with a friend the other day and she confided in me that her and her husband had been sleeping in separate beds for years. She asked me, “Do you think that’s weird?” She said that he snored loudly and tossed and turned while she was a light sleeper who needed her rest in order to function properly the following day.

As I’m sure you can imagine, after 20 years of working in this business, I get a lot of questions that begin with a question about what’s normal. The answer to that is that I believe that every couple is different and it is ultimately about what works for them.

Your mind is probably racing with images of the marital twin beds characteristic of the 50’s. However, surprisingly to some, there has been a growing trend of married couples who choose to sleep in separate quarters. Snoring, teeth-grinding, differing schedules, nighttime television habits, etc. are often contributing factors. In this case, there doesn’t necessarily mean there’s automatically a problem in the relationship. In fact, depending on the circumstances, it can also be a good thing. It shows that the couple is communicating and working together to come up with a solution that fixes a problem rather than making it worse.

Intimacy doesn’t just occur in the bedroom. If you are one of these couples sometimes (or always) sleeps apart in order to achieve more restful sleep, you should set aside special times to be intimate with one another, for example, cooking together, setting aside times to give each other massages, reading to one another, or dance lessons/classes, etc.

I do believe that it is possible to have a strong intimate and sexual connection in either circumstance. The key lies in that both couples agree with the arrangement and practice healthy communication on a regular basis. Intimacy doesn’t necessarily just take place in the bedroom. Intimacy is the bond, tenderness and closeness a couple has for one another inside and outside of the parameters of their four bedroom walls.

One only need to turn on the news to know it’s a tough time for a lot of hard-working people across the country; what many don’t know is that this can really take a toll on your personal life as well as your sex life…especially your libido. Your libido is your sexual desire or sex drive; everyone has one, and everyone’s is different. Your libido can change numerous times over your lifetime and can be affected by changes throughout your lifetime. It’s not uncommon during challenging times to notice a decrease in your libido or your partner’s libido.

Men are inherently the bread-winners, the “hunters” and the providers. When there is a threat to their primary role within a relationship or family, such as losing their job, it can be very stressful and lead to a decreased libido. The most basic symptom of a low libido is having no desire for sexual activity. If you think you have a low sex drive and this is not normal for you, it is important to consult your health care provider to determine the cause for the decrease in sexual desire and to rule out a serious health issue.

Women are also affected by low libido. Changes in hormone levels from pregnancy and childbirth and keeping up with a busy family life can affect a woman’s libido. As the role of “nurturer”, a woman’s role in a family and relationship can cause fatigue and a lack of time for intimacy which can directly affect her libido.

There are many different reasons why a person’s libido can be impacted. Below are some other contributors that can impact a man or woman’s libido.

PHYSICAL
• Menopause – A decline in estrogen levels can affect a woman’s libido
• Dyspareunia – Painful sexual intercourse
• Vaginismus – The involuntary contraction/spasm of the vaginal muscles, which makes penetration difficult, if not impossible
• Pregnancy, childbirth, and breastfeeding—Changes in hormone levels can increase or decrease sexual desire
• Infections – Yeast infections, urinary tract infections, or a sexually transmitted infection could affect a person’s libido
• Problems with orgasm – Being unable to reach orgasm or to reach it within a reasonable period of time
• Illness – Certain illnesses and their medications can alter a person’s libido

PSYCHOLOGICAL
• Depression – Lack of motivation, feeling sad, and withdrawing from activities, including sex
• Performance anxiety – A fear of painful sex, or pressure to have sex or reach orgasm can decrease libido
• Fatigue – Being too tired to have sex
• Lack of time – Busy schedules could leave insufficient time for intimacy
• Familiarity – It is not uncommon for a couple’s desire for sex to decrease over time
• Relationship problems – Difficulties in a relationship can make a couple’s sexual desire suffer
• Stress – Stress hormones can dampen sexual desire and response
• Certain drugs – Antidepressants, oral contraceptive pills, and certain other prescription drugs, as well as illegal drugs and excessive alcohol use, can lower a person’s libido
• Exercise – Too much or too little can affect the libido
• Traumatic experience – Sexual harassment, sexual abuse, or rape can have an impact on your libido

For men, if you find that you have a decreased libido, you may want to try an arousal cream. X-Scream was created to help stimulate blood flow and increase arousal for both men and women. Our only unisex arousal cream, X-Scream is formulated with a mint compound powerful enough for men. To use, take a pea-sized amount and visually divide it into thirds. Apply one small section to the head of the penis, one directly under the penis and the third to the testicles (only if your partner enjoys having this area stimulated) for increased arousal.

For women, we also recommend our arousal creams, Ex-T-Cee and Nympho Niagra and X-Scream. Ex-T-Cee is recommended for first time users of an arousal cream. If you are sensitive or prone to yeast infections, Nympho Niagra is odorless, colorless, flavorless and safe for even the most sensitive women. X-Scream is not recommended for first-time female users, unless the woman is taking medications with sexual side effects (such as anti-depressants or anti-anxiety medication) or is experiencing a loss of sensation due to stress, surgery or other factors. Apply a pea-sized amount to the clitoris during foreplay. This product works by opening the blood vessels in the genitals, increasing blood flow to this area and heightening feelings in the nerve endings. It is also important to use a water-based vaginal lubricant each time you engage in sexual activity. Try Just Like Me or Sweet Seduction, which are both gentle and non-irritating.

You can also talk to your Pure Romance Consultant or visit our Web site for more information about your libido and which products may be right for you.

August is Romance Awareness Month and with less than a week left in August, now’s your last chance to get romantic. Then again, Pure Romance is a big advocate for EVERY month being Romantic Awareness Month so use this week as a jumping off point for a commitment to making your relationship romantic throughout the years to come! Below are our top ten tips for revving up the romance:

1. Hold hands. Touching, cuddling, being affectionate – these are all givens when couples first get together. They foster intimacy and romance and are just as important in the beginning as years down the road when things have gotten comfortable.
2. Random acts of thoughtfulness. Did your partner notice a piece of artwork, clothing or some other coveted item while you’re out and about? Pretend you’ve barely noticed and surprise them by giving it to them at a later date. Create romantic impact by doing it for absolutely no occasion whatsoever!
3. Slow dance in your living room. Forget dancing at the local club or random Wedding Reception. Turn on your favorite CD (one that’s sentimental for the two of you is even better!) and get your groove on right at home. The best part about this is that the bedroom is only a few steps away – or who needs the bedroom? When it comes to lovemaking, any room will do!
4. Kiss. This may seem like common sense, but you’d be amazed how many couples (especially after many years together) neglect to kiss and skip right past foreplay altogether when it comes to being intimate. Kissing is such a passionate way to connect to your partner and is one of the most loving and romantic acts you can do.
5. Keep a memento. If you have to take a business trip or weekend away, leave a memento behind such as a tee-shirt with a hint of your cologne/perfume.
6. Picture text. One of my friends was on vacation and her boyfriend sent picture messages of flowers he saw while hiking with a friend. In some ways this is even more romantic than having flowers delivered to one’s house. The thoughtfulness that accompanies creative and romantic text messages can kindle a fire that will burn long after it was sent.
7. Leave love notes in unexpected places. Just because we live in the electronic age doesn’t mean the idea of love letters should go completely out the window. The fact that someone actually sat down to write a note or letter is often even more impactful left in his brief case or a card behind the windshield wiper of her car – this is a surefire way to keep the romantic fires burning strong.
8. Pamper the one you love. If you know your partner’s had a stressful day, pull out all the stops. Run the water for the tub, light candles, cook dinner and offer a post bubble bath massage.
9. Honor the “Date Night”! Pick one night a week that is strictly yours. No kids, no TV, no distractions and stick to it. Get a baby-sitter and don’t make any excuses. Every couple needs time to focus on one another!
10. Be spontaneous. Romance isn’t fun when it’s predictable. So whatever you decide to do, strategically planning to do it when it’s most unexpected is the best way to go!